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About this Site
Snark Twain is the unacknowledged, uncrowned, pound-for-pound, heavyweight champion writer of the world. He is also extremely modest. He lives in San Francisco with his trophy wife and two cats more beautiful than your children. You can read more of…
Other Recent Articles
Satirists on Strike!
Peer closely enough into your computer screens, dear readers, and you’ll see your humble scribe marching around his television wearing a sandwich board that says “UNFAIR TO SATIRISTS” in big bold letters.
Last week was the last straw. It started with missing…
The Pragdealist Alternative: A Declaration of Independence
A new wind is blowing through America, change is in the air and I’m not talking about Barack Obama. This change is deeper than that, more fundamental. Our president is a product of that change, not its cause. Americans are marginalizing the margins.
The…
We are all libertarians—for us
I never thought I’d live to see the day, but Dick Cheney offered his nation a powerful lesson in citizenship this week. When, at one of his daily Obama bashings, he was asked where he stood on the gay marriage debate,…
Sonia Sotomayor and GOP self-immolation
It is time that President Obama stopped being so unfair to the Republican party. His nomination of Sonia Sotomayor for the Supreme Court puts the lie to his promise of bipartisanship.
The GOP, or Geriatric Old Party, has one strategy left—praying for…
Much ado about everything
Ado, ado, ado.
And now, without further ado, here is All the News That’s Fit to Fake.
Missing link found in Germany! Darwin confirmed! Archeologists triumphantly announced the discovery of “Ida,” a 47 million year old fossil that didn’t have the good manners to…
Dijon mustard, Elizabeth Edwards, steroids, and other fake-opinion hypocrisies
You know what they say about opinions—how they’re just like anuses because everybody’s got one?
Well, it’s a half-assed saying because it’s only half right. The whole truth about opinions and anuses is not found in the aperture, but in the emissions.
And…
Swine Flu Hate Speech
Dear fellow mammals:
The Porcine International Goodwill Society is alarmed by the hate speech being directed at its members by a boorish, unfeeling human race during a tragic time for our species.
“Swine Flu,” you call it so callously. Do you realize Swine…
The Great Obama Rebranding: Part two
Last week I said I’d take a look at how president Obama was doing on his most difficult task: Rebranding the used-up, soiled image of the American Government, both here and abroad.
Well, we’re still short of a hundred days, but…
The Great Obama Rebranding: Part one
Now that the tea party yahoos have had their fun, dressing up in Colonial kitsch while pop-topping six packs of Arizona Southern Style Sweet Tea and pouring it into Lake Erie, poisoning the trout and giving the ducks diabetes, we…
The Crash, the Panic, the Depression.
Here’s the way it works. First, the Crash. If the crash is bad enough, the Panic. If the panic takes hold, there is nothing politicians or economists can do to stop it.
You can’t end a full-throated panic like the one we’re in right…
The American Institute of Plug Pullers wants you!
Are you out of work? Has your career gone down the drain? Have they closed your store and turned it into a soup kitchen? Do your best chances for a dignified retirement now rest with the Grim Reaper? Are you dreading…
Good Things in Bad Times
Spring came late this year. Winter was long and bruising, it tried our patience and tired our spirits, the leaves turned brown and dropped off, our greenbacks turned brown and died, we’ve grown weary, so weary, waiting for the thaw.
Spring came…
How the world should handle Kim Jong-Il
With his latest missile misfire polluting the waters of the North Pacific, an anxious world awaits the next provocation from Kim Jong-Il. Nobody can be quite sure what it will be, another failed nuclear test, another bluster-and-blow-up rocket launch, but one…
